Sunday, January 25, 2009

Big Nose, Small Boobs or Hey, That's My Daughter You're Talking About

I'm one of the youngest guy to play TNH, by about 10 years. To me, some of the most fascinating topics are on parenting and seeing what I've got to look forward to. Witness . . . 

Commish started the conversation, as he usually does. "Okay fellas - your teenage daughter comes to you and your wife and tells you she wants to get a nosejob. This isn't a physical health issue. Do you consider it? T.S. - You're up"

T.S., one of the more liberal members of the group, surprised me when he said "absolutely not. Being a teenage girl is tough, and I can imagine how a whacked-out nose would affect her self-esteem and social ability. But just about every teenage girl has something they are losing sleep over. I want my daughter to be proud of who she is, warts and all."

A couple of other guys agreed. Then Nails spoke up. "It's a tough call. I'm around kids all day. If you guys don't see what these teenagers go through every day I don't think you really know how tough it can be. On the other hand, who's to say the whacked-out nose is permanent? She could still grow into it, it could evolve. I'd say be careful until you at least know she's not going to change again."

I was up next. "No way. I'd try to talk with her about esteem issues, address any underlying concerns. But - this might sound funny and I'm not sure how I'd bring it up with my teenage daughter - maybe an unusual nose turns out to be a good thing. If its that unique, it could turn out to be very sexy. Like you all didn't grow up fantasizing about Cindy Crawford, mole and all! I'm with T.S. - she should be proud of who she is. Commish, what do you think?"

"Well, I'm pretty open to it. Assuming money and health aren't issues, and her self-esteem is that messed up - let's say we consulted doctors and counselors and it could really make a difference - why not make being a teenager a little easier."

"Okay - here's the follow up issue. Your daughter says she wants a boob job. T.S., what do you say?"

"Same response. She is who she is, take pride in it."

Nap finally piped up, with a Cheney-like grin. "It really depends. Are we talking about my daughter, or your daughter. Okay, seriously, if there's no health issue, no way."

Nails: "We're talking about a breast enhancement, not a reduction right?" Couple of snickers, but he went on. "Seriously, think Punky Brewster. Major back issues, you know? Actually, reduction or enhancement, I'm against it for a teenager. My sister had very large boobs and had a reduction in high school. Only problem was, she wasn't done growing, and well, they basically came back a few years later."

Doc looked incredulous. "They came back?! Like a starfish? Only two right?"

Nails just smiled at him. "Seriously, she had the operation too young and needed it again a few years later. But it probably helped with potential back pain and definitely helped her self-esteem. Well, after the second time at least."

Commish summed it up "No way I'd let her do it in high school, but maybe in college, with a doctor's okay I'd be receptive. But if there's no health issue, chances are she'd have to pay for it herself."

I only have boys and, regardless, am years away from dealing directly with issues like this. But once again I really appreciate where the TNH guys are coming from. Check out the survey to the right. What would you do?


21 comments:

Anonymous said...

You guys are....dumb guys. If a girl has an ugly nose and it detracts from her beauty or potential to be attractive, what's the big deal? Get it fixed. Isn't it great that we live in a society where we have these options? It's a very safe procedure and a quick recovery, leading to a life without self-consciousness and with an enhanced appearance. What girl doesn't want to be appealing? What principle are you adhering to that mandates the virtue of ugliness? Puh-lease. Boobs are another story. Far more complicated and not even close to a nose job. Boob jobs only last about 10 years, if that, depending how large the implants are. Plus, it makes screening for cancer more difficult. AND it probably interferes with breastfeeding. A great bra can accomplish some of what a boob job would anyway. As for reduction, that does interfere with breastfeeding, so that can wait, but should be done if it's a real problem. Don't minimize beauty. You are drawn to it because it's hardwired into you. Admit it, you savages.

Hoops Commish said...

I admit it - I'm drawn to beautiful noses and boobs

Signed, Savage Dumb Guy

Anonymous said...

Okanonymous you are very knowledgeable. Did you have something done when you were a teenager and has any nenber of TNH seen the new you?

Wookie of Year said...

What about hair removal?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous had a nose job at age 16, just like her mother did around the same age. Best thing ever. Made huge difference. Felt better about self which transforms everything.

Big Guy said...

Anonymous,

If you feel the transformation is well worth it - how do you feel about plastic surgery or botox when you are 50 or older? Also,
what soup is being served tonite with dinner? There is no poker later so feed him well.

Anonymous said...

I think plastic surgery, in theory, is fantastic. But there's always going to be "bad" work out there so it must be done by someone skilled, not just any surgeon with a scalpel. Gotta do the research. I think most things that makes you feel better about yourself are worth it. So I wouldn't put an age limit on it. 50? Go for it. I don't dig botox. Too temporary.
Soup for dinner? Bad for the face. Excessive salt makes you wake up all puffy.
No poker? Then he should poke her.

Wookie of Year said...

"No poker? Then he should poke her."

Who are you???????????

Big Guy said...

Anonymous - truth time. Are you Meghan from Applebees? Are you one of TNH members? Their spouse? Or six degrees of separation? What city do you live in and what made you get on this site if none of the above? Also - your responses contradict whether you are male or female

Anonymous said...

I did a google search for something and somehow this site came up so I hung around and read some posts. Being opinionated, I felt I had to add my two cents. I'm definitely not Meghan from Applebees. In fact, I haven't been employed for years. Why is it so strange that I'm here even if I'm not part of your posse? You're posting your stuff on the World Wide Web. They might even be reading you in China. And why would you say that I'm contradicting myself with respect to gender? What the heck is that supposed to mean? How narrow is your understanding of females?

Lithium Crystals said...

Anonymous,

The "No poker? Then he should poke her." threw us off. Generally not a comment from a female but you are the exception then

Not ready to fess up yet huh?

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's not generally a comment made by females within certain age brackets? Maybe you guys are accustomed to dealing with women in their 50s, since someone here raised that age in a question? Maybe it's because I'm younger than that? *jezebel*

TNH Guy said...

Hey Anonymous - Thanks for joining us. This website is definitely for anyone who wants to participate, as well as the guys who are part of the Thursday Night Hoops group. We hope you tell your friends and come back often. And in answer to your question, the entire TNH group's understanding of females is extremely narrow!

Anonymous said...

Your understanding can always expand, if you want it to.
*jezebel*

Steven said...

It doesn't matter if you have a big nose or a crooked teeth. It also doesn't matter if you will go as far as plastic surgery. I mean, if that what makes you happy, then go.

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Kyle Xanders said...

Those who would want to fix something in their body would have little to no problem at all. There are a lot of advantages of plastic surgery but mainly this type of surgery is used to enhance beauty.

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daniellaprice30 said...

It's really all about self-esteem that girls undergo plastic surgery even at a very young age. Maybe they need more support and encouragement from parents and friends that beauty lies within.

Becky said...

Bullying really can scar a person for life. If getting a cosmetic procedure can remedy that, then why not? Just be sure to do all the research you can, and find the best doctor for the job.

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andieclark said...

Women always want to please men that's why they undergo Long Island plastic surgery. I think that's not doing them any justice because men should like them for who they are no matter what size they have.

Emily said...

Plastic surgery is now a very common surgery in any part of the world. In fact, I had my nose done. It's good to know that cosmetic surgery in Perth is very common as well. So, I decided to have my nose fixed because I found it quite big.

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